The Edwards Report has obtained an exclusive copy of a transcript from CNN for Thursday night's vice presidential debate. The transcript was hard to obtain, as the debate has yet to happen. In following the very highest in journalistic standards, we now present the transcript to you, the reader:
Sen. Biden: . . . as Lincoln said on the radio after the outbreak of the Revolutionary War, 'The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.'
Gov. Palin: Well, it would be the position of a McCain administration that Russia represents a threat to democracy throughout the world, and we must address this issue seriously but without igniting another Cold War.
Sen. Biden: I'd like to respond to that. I would, I mean Sen. Obama would, respond like Gen. Sherman who called in air strikes and, in fact, personally drove the tank that led the charge to sack Constantinople.
Gov. Palin: Um . . . well, Sen. McCain and I believe that we should continue the path to victory in Iraq that was put forth by Gen. Petraeus, and . . .
Sen. Biden: Well, I went to law school, so I know full well that a Biden administration, I mean an Obama/Biden administration, would respond to any terrorist attack like Genghis Khan who flew his magic carpet as he went on to conquer the Aztecs.
Gwen Ifill: Thank you both for joining us. Goodnight.
Campbell Brown: There you have the first and only vice presidential debate, and you have to wonder if the McCain camp purposely set it up for only one debate.
Anderson Cooper: Absolutely. Sen. Biden came into this as an underdog, but came away the clear winner. Throughout the debate he was able to demonstrate his vast foreign policy experience. For some commentary, let's go to James Carville. James?
James Carville: Thanks, Anderson. Clearly little Sarah is in over her head. She made so many gaffes tonight I couldn't add them up.
Brown: We just heard James Carville's view, now for the other side, let's go to Paul Begala. Paul?
Paul Begala: Thanks, Campbell. Clearly little Sarah is in over her head. She made so many gaffes tonight I couldn't add them up.
Brown: After tonight's performance, you have to wonder how long Gov. Palin stays on the McCain ticket. Keep it here on CNN, always no bias, no bull.
http://edwardsreport.blogspot.com/2008/09/exclusive-transcript-from-thursdays-vp.html
Showing posts with label Campbell Brown. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Campbell Brown. Show all posts
Monday, September 29, 2008
Thursday, September 25, 2008
Weekend at Larry's
The Edwards Report has learned through sources at CNN that famed interviewer Larry King actually died three years ago. For the last three years, CNN has propped up King's corpse on the set of Larry King Live, switching out his trademark suspenders each night. A show producer moves King's mouth and body with string like a Marionette puppet, while a voice over announcer mimics his voice. In order to better represent King's style, the voice over announcer does neither research nor preparation for his interviews. The news was a shock to King's wife, who has shared a bed with him over the last three years. "I didn't even notice a difference in him," she was overheard commenting. The stunning news comes as King has fallen in the ratings behind even such obscure networks as CNR,which bills itself as the 24 hour Charles Nelson Reilly network, the Polka! Polka! Polka! channel, and MSNBC, a news network dedicated to serving the needs of the hermaphrodite community. The Edwards Report tried to reach King's CNN colleague Anderson Cooper for comment, but he was busy seeking advice from Campbell Brown on how to better read the news while simultaneously having your lips attached to Sen. Obama's backside.
Friday, September 05, 2008
Breaking - New Palin Scandal!
Impacting Hard
The political world was thrown into chaos Tuesday night as a possible devastating scandal involving Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin and one of her children emerged. The New York Times is set to report in five front page articles on Wednesday morning that Piper, the Palin's 6-year-old daughter, has been a very naughty girl, raising questions about Gov. Palin's governing abilities. Among other shocking details, the Times is revealing that Piper once stayed up past bedtime and refused to eat her vegetables. Bernice Satanica, the head of Humorless Alliance for Grrls! (HAG), responded to the revelations by asking, "If she can't get her 6-year-old to eat broccoli, can we really trust her to negotiate with Ahmadinejad? What kind of mother has ever had a child that disobeyed them?" Campbell Brown, a CNN anchor who also works as a spokesman for the Obama campaign, asked a McCain staffer about the damaging information during her most recent newscast. "This makes one wonder if Palin was really vetted at all. Why didn't the McCain campaign hire a private investigator to follow Piper around so they could have avoided this embarrassment from the start?" Campbell then went on to say that Gen. Petraeus was in charge of putting kids to bed, not parents, before turning things over to Anderson Cooper, who had just returned from a day of antique shopping and Appletinis with his girlfriend, Anita Beard.
The political world was thrown into chaos Tuesday night as a possible devastating scandal involving Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin and one of her children emerged. The New York Times is set to report in five front page articles on Wednesday morning that Piper, the Palin's 6-year-old daughter, has been a very naughty girl, raising questions about Gov. Palin's governing abilities. Among other shocking details, the Times is revealing that Piper once stayed up past bedtime and refused to eat her vegetables. Bernice Satanica, the head of Humorless Alliance for Grrls! (HAG), responded to the revelations by asking, "If she can't get her 6-year-old to eat broccoli, can we really trust her to negotiate with Ahmadinejad? What kind of mother has ever had a child that disobeyed them?" Campbell Brown, a CNN anchor who also works as a spokesman for the Obama campaign, asked a McCain staffer about the damaging information during her most recent newscast. "This makes one wonder if Palin was really vetted at all. Why didn't the McCain campaign hire a private investigator to follow Piper around so they could have avoided this embarrassment from the start?" Campbell then went on to say that Gen. Petraeus was in charge of putting kids to bed, not parents, before turning things over to Anderson Cooper, who had just returned from a day of antique shopping and Appletinis with his girlfriend, Anita Beard.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
Posts
